1 week...
Assalam `alaykum!
It's been awhile since I have posted, but time has really been flying, subhan'Allah. For the past couple of weeks, I have been doing a lot of reading and lecture-listening in preparation for my trip. After work everyday, I've either been going to Target (Tarjet! =)), Victoria Gardens, or some other store to get the things I need-- rather what I think I will "need."
As time has gone by, this trip has become more and more real to me. Yesterday, my family had some company over and my brother shared many of the official Rihla pictures taken by a sister last year. He started to recount some of the stories that were shared by the blessed shuyukh (may Allah preserve them all), and told us about the various trips we would take. As he shared these wonderful memories, I couldn't help but have tears in my eyes-- out of sincere awe and excitement to inshaAllah be there and experience them myself, but also out of wonder as to why I have been selected to participate in this year's Rihla. I'm not even there yet (and insha'Allah please pray that I do have a safe trip, because if Allah still does not will me to be there, I won't get there). I don't deserve such a trip like this, but I am so truly grateful of being accepted.
As much as I try to prepare myself logistically in terms of buying proper clothing to stand the intense heat, shoes to endure the hiking, and medication to fight all those horror story illnesses that people get from bad food and water, it's difficult to try not to let these things get to me. Alhamdulillah that people have warned me and this allows me to better prepare, but I sincerely want to focus on meeting the Beloved Prophet (peace be upon him) and on performing `umrah insha'Allah.
I've thought about how amazing the shuyukh are to sincerely want to be a part of this trip again and to share not even like 1% of their immense knowledge with us (and that 1% is amazing by itself!), and inshaAllah how great the company will be of the fellow sisters and brothers allowed to go on this trip. Whenever I have gone to some deen intensive, I always admire the sisters I've interacted with because of their genuineness, their knowledge, and just being able to share the epiphanies we have on a daily basis. There is great benefit in surrounding yourself with good company, and I am definitely looking forward with spending about 4 weeks with my sisters in Islam.
This past year, as many of you know, has been a trying time for me. Alhamdulillah it's taken me awhile to learn a lot, and recently I've critically looked at my life. I started to take a look at how I've gotten to the point I am at in my life, what I'm currently doing, and insha'Allah where I want to go. With all the things going on in the world, especially in the Middle East, I know I'm truly blessed, but this blessing is also a big test that brings on a lot of responsibility. The struggle many of us in the U.S. go through is nothing compared to what people go through in other countries where all they see is fighting, being denied education, being unrightfully thrown out of their homes. But I do know that Allah tests us according to what we can handle, and subhanAllah just to think that we are all going through tests for the sake of bettering ourselves inshaAllah and also to gain the pleasure of Allah-- so really only WE have something to gain from it. We are here to serve and worship Allah through various means He has provided for us, and He has nothing to gain from it because He has and could have anything He wanted. SubhanAllah how we beg for His bounty OUT of the bounty He's given us!
Recently, I've had somewhat of a big reality check that has hit me in which I've thought about how much I want to change and I've re-evaluated some of the goals I've had and currently started picking up the pace in accomplishing/working on them. I think Allah has truly given me this amazing blessing by allowing me to embark on a journey to Mecca and Madinah. I feel like a lot of my weaknesses and gazillion shortcomings have been exposed, but alhamdulillah now I know exactly what some of the things are that I need to work on. Someone once told me that we can never be sure that we can come back from this trip changed, we may gain a new consciousness, but what makes us think we can change? I pondered my answer to this question because often we naturally think that we will go on a trip to Mecca and Madinah and will return a different person. I know that people are tested when journeying to Mecca, but the true test is when a person comes back. A sign of an accepted `umrah or hajj is that a person returns changed in a better way. I can only pray that this happens, but at the same time, I have to make sure it does! If anyone can come back from such an amazing trip not having changed, then when can we ever change?
I have so many plans inshaAllah when I come back, that I realize the true test is when I do return. We often learn so much, which is the easy part; the hard part is coupling the knowledge with action.
I know that many of you have expressed the desire to want to go to the Rihla in the future or wished you could have gone, I am asking you all to help me. This blessing of going is an immense responsibility that I need your help with to fulfill-- what I mean is that knowledge will be graciously bestowed upon me (inshaAllah!) that I will be held accountable for sharing and implementing. I don't want the experience to just be everlasting memories, I want this to be something I can relive each and everyday through my actions, through a change (improvement inshaAllah) in character, and through my relationships with each and every one of you for the sake of Allah, and His sake alone.
I am yet to obtain my visa as well as plane ticket from NY to Saudi as the organizers are having some drama, so please pray that this process is completed soon as I am leaving to NY early Sunday morning inshaAllah. I know that there will continue to be many struggles along the way, so please keep me in your du`as that Allah grants me the strength and patience for my travels for His sake. I am not worthy of this opportunity nor am I even worthy of all of your friendships to share these experiences with because you all are wonderful people I have learned so much from.
I am sincerely asking all of you to forgive me as I know that I don't have what even comes close to the best character, and I probably have offended you all in some fashion. Please don't take this lightly, and I am asking this with pure genuineness, and as a humble servant of Allah insha'Allah. Please forgive me of my faults and please pray for me that Allah forgives me as well.
1 more week you all!
It's been awhile since I have posted, but time has really been flying, subhan'Allah. For the past couple of weeks, I have been doing a lot of reading and lecture-listening in preparation for my trip. After work everyday, I've either been going to Target (Tarjet! =)), Victoria Gardens, or some other store to get the things I need-- rather what I think I will "need."
As time has gone by, this trip has become more and more real to me. Yesterday, my family had some company over and my brother shared many of the official Rihla pictures taken by a sister last year. He started to recount some of the stories that were shared by the blessed shuyukh (may Allah preserve them all), and told us about the various trips we would take. As he shared these wonderful memories, I couldn't help but have tears in my eyes-- out of sincere awe and excitement to inshaAllah be there and experience them myself, but also out of wonder as to why I have been selected to participate in this year's Rihla. I'm not even there yet (and insha'Allah please pray that I do have a safe trip, because if Allah still does not will me to be there, I won't get there). I don't deserve such a trip like this, but I am so truly grateful of being accepted.
As much as I try to prepare myself logistically in terms of buying proper clothing to stand the intense heat, shoes to endure the hiking, and medication to fight all those horror story illnesses that people get from bad food and water, it's difficult to try not to let these things get to me. Alhamdulillah that people have warned me and this allows me to better prepare, but I sincerely want to focus on meeting the Beloved Prophet (peace be upon him) and on performing `umrah insha'Allah.
I've thought about how amazing the shuyukh are to sincerely want to be a part of this trip again and to share not even like 1% of their immense knowledge with us (and that 1% is amazing by itself!), and inshaAllah how great the company will be of the fellow sisters and brothers allowed to go on this trip. Whenever I have gone to some deen intensive, I always admire the sisters I've interacted with because of their genuineness, their knowledge, and just being able to share the epiphanies we have on a daily basis. There is great benefit in surrounding yourself with good company, and I am definitely looking forward with spending about 4 weeks with my sisters in Islam.
This past year, as many of you know, has been a trying time for me. Alhamdulillah it's taken me awhile to learn a lot, and recently I've critically looked at my life. I started to take a look at how I've gotten to the point I am at in my life, what I'm currently doing, and insha'Allah where I want to go. With all the things going on in the world, especially in the Middle East, I know I'm truly blessed, but this blessing is also a big test that brings on a lot of responsibility. The struggle many of us in the U.S. go through is nothing compared to what people go through in other countries where all they see is fighting, being denied education, being unrightfully thrown out of their homes. But I do know that Allah tests us according to what we can handle, and subhanAllah just to think that we are all going through tests for the sake of bettering ourselves inshaAllah and also to gain the pleasure of Allah-- so really only WE have something to gain from it. We are here to serve and worship Allah through various means He has provided for us, and He has nothing to gain from it because He has and could have anything He wanted. SubhanAllah how we beg for His bounty OUT of the bounty He's given us!
Recently, I've had somewhat of a big reality check that has hit me in which I've thought about how much I want to change and I've re-evaluated some of the goals I've had and currently started picking up the pace in accomplishing/working on them. I think Allah has truly given me this amazing blessing by allowing me to embark on a journey to Mecca and Madinah. I feel like a lot of my weaknesses and gazillion shortcomings have been exposed, but alhamdulillah now I know exactly what some of the things are that I need to work on. Someone once told me that we can never be sure that we can come back from this trip changed, we may gain a new consciousness, but what makes us think we can change? I pondered my answer to this question because often we naturally think that we will go on a trip to Mecca and Madinah and will return a different person. I know that people are tested when journeying to Mecca, but the true test is when a person comes back. A sign of an accepted `umrah or hajj is that a person returns changed in a better way. I can only pray that this happens, but at the same time, I have to make sure it does! If anyone can come back from such an amazing trip not having changed, then when can we ever change?
I have so many plans inshaAllah when I come back, that I realize the true test is when I do return. We often learn so much, which is the easy part; the hard part is coupling the knowledge with action.
I know that many of you have expressed the desire to want to go to the Rihla in the future or wished you could have gone, I am asking you all to help me. This blessing of going is an immense responsibility that I need your help with to fulfill-- what I mean is that knowledge will be graciously bestowed upon me (inshaAllah!) that I will be held accountable for sharing and implementing. I don't want the experience to just be everlasting memories, I want this to be something I can relive each and everyday through my actions, through a change (improvement inshaAllah) in character, and through my relationships with each and every one of you for the sake of Allah, and His sake alone.
I am yet to obtain my visa as well as plane ticket from NY to Saudi as the organizers are having some drama, so please pray that this process is completed soon as I am leaving to NY early Sunday morning inshaAllah. I know that there will continue to be many struggles along the way, so please keep me in your du`as that Allah grants me the strength and patience for my travels for His sake. I am not worthy of this opportunity nor am I even worthy of all of your friendships to share these experiences with because you all are wonderful people I have learned so much from.
I am sincerely asking all of you to forgive me as I know that I don't have what even comes close to the best character, and I probably have offended you all in some fashion. Please don't take this lightly, and I am asking this with pure genuineness, and as a humble servant of Allah insha'Allah. Please forgive me of my faults and please pray for me that Allah forgives me as well.
1 more week you all!
posted by Ruby at 9:21 PM
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